Keep Your Heart Open, No Matter How Many Times It’s Meant To Close

We can’t know love without the possibility of pain

Vincent Van Patten
4 min readSep 1

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Photo by Sebastian Mark on Unsplash

My heart and my mind pulled in different directions; love and confusion, life proffers another lesson.
The heart’s complex and here I am,
penning thoughts to understand,
shit ain’t easy,
shit is messy,
but to feel is such a blessin’,
tangled up inside
’cause fear can’t hold me back
I close my heart it ceases beating
I’ll rip it open until the day I die.

Nothing could be more worth it.

Still, I’m tangled up inside. Life’s so hard to truly understand.

Maybe it’s not meant to be understood, but lived.

Part of me’s afraid that I’ll never find the one,
while what’s in front of me hurts, I succumb.
Because I want to feel that love which I’ve never truly found,
so much love to give it hurts to hold it down.
These thoughts consume me, I’m fuckin scared, to lose someone our love impaired, by trying leaping risking pain and loss —
I stand on the edge; she steps back.
Guarding the thing she treasures.
Afraid that it’ll break freefallin.

Hurts more to play it safe,
to know love takes risking pain,
long to know the joy of sunlight
I’m used to dancing in the rain
we’re human beings no one to fault,
I care about her still; so deeply,
am I strong to walk away.

It’ll hurt, I think, for I don’t know,
to know I have to let her go and
seek another heart to share — I
can’t forget who I am.
I carry my own heart to bear.
This fire consumes the world I see a hand to hold a body cold
made warmer in my arms; love is not a thing to force.

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Vincent Van Patten

Exploring what lights my soul on fire ❤️‍🔥 Living in Japan. For my writing, podcast, photography and much more, check out vincentvanpatten.com